October Thrills

Today is the 1st of October, thus I will welcome the tenth month of the year and the second month of Autumn by celebrating some of what it has to offer…

* Let’s start with Oktoberfest in Munich because everyone loves the idea of blondes in a Bavarian beer maid costume. Most boyfriends will explain to reluctant girlfriends that it’s a great trip; an opportunity to bond with their friends and admire the intricate stitching on the corsets of the attire. What they really mean is they relish the chance to witness breasts almost popping out of the petticoat and the authority of throwing beer around as though they are Christian VII of Denmark, laughing with their subjects. This isn’t wine tasting, it’s beer chugging, throwing…and throwing up. It also happens to be a great deal of fun, and despite the amount of stick German’s get about having no sense of humour, they throw some of the best parties in the world.

* Pumpkins feel appreciated as they are snatched off the shelves of Supermarkets and brought home to have their insides scooped out and faces carved in, later displayed on the windowsill along with the rest of their relatives as though they are a war trophy. If you are lost on my sentiments, then watch Sausage Party. On the plus side, every edible produce seems to be infused with Pumpkin Spice, which is rich in Vitamin A and beta-carotene.

* The leaves change colour and fall to the ground. Since every single leaf out there is a magnificent shade of red, brown, and yellow unique to every fellow leaf, the floor becomes a colourful crispy blanket of foliage. If you ignore your birthday and tend to bury your head in the sand with most situations, this is a despondent reminder that an entire year has passed, so what did you do with it?

* October follows September which means that there is a lull period from birthdays. Anyone born in September knows in their subconscious that their parents or (parent) got frisky on New Years Eve with their respective partner or some stranger. Nine months later they were born and whether you were a mistake or not is a different question; just know something more powerful than us, Durex and dignity decided that you were meant to be created. This makes September an expensive month with everyone’s birthday popping up. October is a time to lick your wounds and try melding your credit card back to its original shape. Rest assured, the only necessity you need to purchase in October are penny sweets sold at extortionate prices but it’s okay because a kid dressed as the pope or Walter White just turned up at your doorstep.

* I looked this up and apparently its National Seafood month but who cares? Next!

* Presidential debates takes place which can be highly entertaining, especially if you saw the most recent debate. Republican vs. Democrats: even if you are not American, you know the next leader will make a significant impact on the rest of the world. Towards the deadline, you will see the best promises pulled out the hat in a bid to take the title.

There you have some of the highlights for October. Instead of moaning that the limited sunshine we had has now completely dissipated, it’s time to embrace Autumn and ask your nanna to start knitting those much needed gloves – winter is coming.


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